8 Secrets to Having a Real Love

Real Love is a driving force in all of our lives.

We are constantly confronted by our need to give and receive love. It becomes part of our daily existence, the stories we tell, and the futures we plan.

Love emerges as a central theme in all of our creative endeavors.

I believe deep down we all want to experience a better kind of love and project that authentic love outward.

For the follower of Christ, love is especially important.

It is a Cornerstone of our faith and is the means by which we put it into practice. As Christ has loved us, we must also love others.

There is a better love. This kind of authentic, Divinely enabled love can transform our relationships and create opportunities to express our faith even in the most difficult of circumstances.

You Will Never Be Unloved

Love is a necessity and we will naturally seek after it.

Sometimes, you may feel like there is no love in your life. It is at these times where we feel the most vulnerable and desperate.

If we do not feel love directed at us, we tend to chase it. We will settle for a substandard replica of love to fill that void.

That kind of love promises things it can not give and we will be left unsatisfied. People make really bad decisions in the pursuit of this inferior kind love.

The consequences of those decisions can last a lifetime.

But there is something you need to know. You will never be unloved.

God loves you fiercely. He has orchestrated all of human history to provide you with a way to know Him and to have a personal relationship with Him.

‘”For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. ‘ – John 3:16

This is a promise and you are the object of that affection.

God loves us with a superior kind of love. He then places people in our lives to reflect this real love toward us.

Having this unconditional love lavished on us gives us confidence and security as we navigate the twists and turns of life.

We can make decisions with a clear mind and a satisfied heart.

Then we can really make an impact on our relationships. We have the responsibility to reflect that same kind of real love outwardly.

As God pours His heart into us, we reach out and love others with that same incredible affection.

Love Originates From God

‘Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God;’ 1 John 4:7

It is important to know the Source of this kind of love.

There is nowhere else to find the true love you desire.

The search for love in the wrong places leads to heartache and despair.

Finding love directly from the Source gives vibrancy to your life. Only by having a personal relationship with God will you find the affection your soul craves.

We are designed by Him to have a relationship with Him and nothing else will fill that place in us.

God is love.

Searching for real love from another source will only produce a cheap copy that doesn’t have the power to fully satisfy.

The emptiness that remains will perpetuate the search for false love and create a self-destructive cycle.

Love starts with God and your relationship with Him and radiates outward into all of your other significant relationships.

The best relationships are those that are fully invested where the individuals reflect the amazing love of God toward each other without expectation.

Love is Your Birthright

‘and everyone who loves is born of God’ 1 John 4:7

I love my kids. So much joy wrapped up in these wonderful gifts from God.

From time to time I see one of them doing something that reminds me of myself at that age.

My wife will often make the comment “at least they get it honest.” Because they are my children, they will inherit certain things from me.

From mannerisms to physical features to any material goods at my disposal, my kids will have a lasting inheritance.

As a child of God, you have an inheritance as well.

We were designed to be creatures with the capacity for real love but sin entered into the picture and we were broken.

When God redeems us, we are born again and have a new spiritual lineage. God is our Father.

Because of this, we can inherit certain traits from Him. One of these is the renewed capacity to love authentically.

Take hold of your birthright and choose to be a person who loves others.

Our Love is Enabled by God’s Love

‘We love, because He first loved us. ‘ 1 John 4:19

Imagine someone standing in front of you lifting a car over their heads.

That would be a pretty impressive sight.

I would think that a mighty deed would draw a crowd. Now imagine the person that lifted the car asking you to stand underneath it and hold it up while they move on to the next feat.

“I can’t hold a car over my head” you might say. “But I did the hard part”, the mysterious strong man would reply, “I already lifted it.”

This seems ludicrous, doesn’t it?

It takes just as much strength to keep the car in the air as it does to lift the car in the first place.

You would never be able to continue what the strong man has started. Real love is like this.

The Source of this real love is God, but He is also the One that continually enables it.

We can not drift from our relationship with God and expect our other relationships to remain healthy and strong.

The only way we can adequately love others is for God’s love to be perpetually present in our lives.

The Knowledge of God Helps Love Grow

‘and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. ‘ 1 John 4:7

If I were to ask a room full of people if they would like to see the love in their relationships grow over time and become even stronger than ever, every person would raise their hand.

We all want a love that doesn’t become stagnant.

We want the kind of love that is a vibrant driving force behind our actions. While most false loves diminish and fade, real love grows over time.

God is love. So, the more we know God, the more we understand love.

The time you spend reading your Bible and the time you spend in prayer not only adds value to your relationship, but it increases your knowledge of the Father.

Understanding His heart for people and applying His truth and wisdom to every area of your life impacts the quality of love that you exhibit.

Make a commitment to grow daily. Take steps each day to learn biblical truth and apply it to your everyday habits.

Love Initiates Without Thought of Reciprocation

‘But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. ‘ Romans 5:8

Love makes the first move.

When we were incapable of reaching out to God, He came to us. While we were steeped in sin and had no desire to acknowledge God, He still loved us and acted on that love.

We often wait for someone to do something nice for us before we begin to respond with love.

In relationships, we can develop a barter system where love is only given when something else is provided.

Unmet expectations can drag down any relationship.

Real love loves without expectation. It is free from the burden of keeping score.

It loves with abandon and without thought of reciprocation. When we begin to find our joy in the giving rather than the receiving, we see true fulfillment.

Begin today, by doing random acts of love and kindness and do not think of any kind reward.

Find creative ways to express the love of God to others.

Love Will Make You a Better Person

‘Love does no wrong to a neighbor; therefore love is the fulfillment of the law. ‘ Romans 13:10

This seems like it should be obvious, but I want us to stop and think about the enormity of this verse.

When certain lawyers wanted to trick Jesus, they asked Him a question about the law.

Which of the many Jewish laws passed down from Moses was the most important? Which one was superior to the others?

His answer was to love God with everything you are and then to love your neighbor in the same fashion.

Then He makes the statement that all of the law and writings of the prophets hang on those two concepts.

So to put this in perspective, if we could love like God loves and project that upward and outward, we could do no wrong.

Now, of course, we are human and will love imperfectly, but we need to be moving in the direction of God’s real love.

The more we implement this perfect love into our lives the more we have to offer the world around us.

We can become the kind of people that positively contribute to our circles of influence and draw them closer to Christ.

Love Cannot Be Taken Away From You

‘For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. ‘ Romans 8:38-39

Another area that we struggle with is the fear of losing the love that we have.

This can cause us to make all kinds of bad decisions trying to grasp it.

A lot of times this is a result of mistaking the feelings that flow from love with the actual love itself.  Love at its core is a decision.

So many people desire the emotion but fail to understand that the emotion is a byproduct of real love that fills our hearts.

This real love cannot be removed from our lives.

Paul gives us every possible scenario to reassure us that this love cannot be taken away.

Reminding both of the Source and the Supply of this love, Paul was us to have confidence in the fact that this love is permanent.

It is not affected by outside circumstance and cannot be stolen from you by anyone.

Love Will Turn You Into a Giver

‘For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. ‘ John 3:16

You will consistently encounter two different types of people.

There are givers and there are takers.

Most of us desire to be givers, but this doesn’t happen by accident. As we get closer to God and embrace His love, we become more of the giver we would like to be.

When I talk about giving, I’m not talking about money.

Money is an important piece of generosity, but giving starts in the heart. We become givers first when we see the need.

Then taking inventory of all that God has blessed us with, whether it is ability, time, or resources, we meet the needs of others.

This generosity is set into motion because of the love we reflect outward. It is impossible to love people and then only take from them.

Decide to be a giver.

Use what you have been entrusted with to be a blessing to those who come into contact with you.

You Are Loved

You are loved by an infinite, all-powerful God.

Don’t bury that investment in the sand. Become the person that God uses to show His love to the humanity starting with your small piece of the World.

If we spend our energy loving God and loving others, we will be surprised at how the rest of life comes into clearer focus.

One thought on “8 Secrets to Having a Real Love

  • at
    Permalink

    I pray God to continually water your fountain of divine wisdom in Jesus mighty name. Amen

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *